353 – The habit of saying NO

’No’ is a two-letter word and yet it is a powerful word. ‘No’ can be looked at in many ways. Let us start with how does one feel when one says ‘No’? Is it a good feeling or a bad feeling? How would you view it?

Are you strong and you are setting your boundaries? Are you in the mode of being in control? I have examined the power of saying ‚’No’. I found that most people say ‘No‘ as a matter of fact, without considering what is being asked. Then when one goes back to them and asks again, the reply will be ‘Yes‘. The reason they refuse is because they are being governed by their nature.

It is reported that saying ‘No‘, can create more mental health stability by helping with self-care and building self-esteem and confidence setting boundaries. Saying ‘No‘ is a daunting thing to do so, but there are ways to make the process a bit easier. I appreciate what is written and we are imagining that we are developing our will, when giving a refusal, are we only thinking about ourselves?

Examine your swabhava

Bhava is nature and swa means personal self. Swabhava is a Sanskrit word. If one becomes aware of one’s personal nature then situations of conflicts, of mental and emotional disturbance can be avoided. When we engage with others we react with their external expressions. Therefore, we only see the ego, desires, and weaknesses. We do not see the real person. In order to understand others, we have to work on ourselves and must go deeper into the nature of others. Then when we say ‚No’ we are being genuine and mean it. One cannot respond reactively to others because then one will be living in a hell. One has to learn to discriminate between negative and positive responses. One has to become a witness and then it is possible to eliminate the affliction of one’s mind.

Confucius, ‘I hear, and I forgot. I see and I remember. I do and I understand’.

Aim Hrim Klim


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