Are we able to forgive easily? Do we hold grudges? Do we let old hurts and wounds fester. We are all guilty. What happens when we hold on to the past grievances and offences, sometimes the creations of our fertile imagination. Do we wish to remain full of bitterness?
How do we learn the act of Kshama? Try to recognize the feeling and the trigger of that memory which generated this lack of mercy. It can be hurt, anger, rejection, or perceived insults. Now analyze the feeling, to understand the source and why are you unforgiving.
Observe your antagonism and thoughts about the other individual and try to change your notions about him or her, by focusing on his/her positive qualities. Are you being unreasonable, and imagining that a slight has become magnified?
See the whole picture
After you have introspected on this subject, try to see the whole picture. Where are you coming from and where is the other person coming from. It may be a tiny hurt, unintentional and the other party was not even aware of the offence. Now bring the idea of forgiveness and accept the person for who he/she is. Be genuine and see how you reacted and this situation arose because of your over reaction.
Can you smile at the thought of that person and have affection for him/her?
Remember that none of us is an angel, it is normal to be unforgiving in many cases. However the damage done to us by being unforgiving is enormous.
“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” Mahatma Gandhi.
“Forgiveness is not an occasional act, it is a constant attitude.” Martin Luther King.
“Last but not least, always forgive your enemies, nothing annoys them so much.” Oscar Wilde.
Aim Hrim Klim