There is self-compassion, compassion and idiot compassion.
The Buddha spoke about self-compassion. He said that one can search the entire universe for someone, who deserves your love and compassion more than you do yourself and you will not find that person anywhere. Because that person is you. You deserve that love and compassion more than anyone else.
The balance of between the movement of compassion and the stillness of equanimity is quite subtle and, in every situation, we need to watch out for it. Compassion for many of us becomes like being a martyr, where we are only thinking about care and generosity for others and not addressing ourselves.
Compassion is not a relationship between the healer and the wounded. It’s a relationship between equals. Only when we know our own darkness well we can be present with the darkness of others. Compassion becomes real when we recognise our shared humanity. Prema Chodren is an American Buddhist monk.
Idiot compassion was coined by Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche. Idiot compassion, is what enables harmful behaviour. One in a fit of pity one tends to give persons what they want, because one does not want to see people suffer. It refers to something we all do a lot of and call it compassion. It is enabling in a different and destructive way and it is more like disabling in the long term. Prema defines it as being selfish because our so-called help harms the individual. We see this in the case of addicts especially and the so-called care-givers are called co-dependents.
In a nutshell it is that we see all experiences as they are, we feel and want them. We are aware of our motivations. The practice of compassion will break down the barriers between ourselves and others so that we know it is the practice of pure wisdom. Now we come to what compassion is for us. It is a cultivation of the practice. We have to feel rage and anger and not deny it. We have to develop pure awareness. Pure awareness is to behold what is happening. No veneer is laid on it. We are to experience it but not get lost in it. Therefore, we identify with who one really is.
Compassion is defined in Hinduism as the mainstay of the faith and it is a fundamental aspect of Dharma. It reflects deep concern for all beings.
Aim Hrim Klim